Dealing with Inner Monster
Hola crazy people, who wants be crazy or who already lose to control. This time I will twaddle about dealing with inner monster. I was in delusion for a long time. If I need to say openly, I had lost my control for a while. Now I’m continuing to walk on my way again.
Because of I made a mistake that I did before again, it took me to really deep thoughts. Why a person made same mistakes, specially if the person made it before. When I started to think about that I noticed actually there were lots of things that I didn’t understand before.
Thinking about this, about cause – effect connection from direct experience was really difficult and painful. It’s still continuing on the background. I know lots of people who loves me tried to warn but direct experience teaching much more.
Our inner monsters not a thing that you can underestimate easily. I was underestimate it so much and this is the result. 😀 We need to know when and how we need this monster in our lives.
After the talking, analyzing and inspecting the people, I realized that lots of people just living without asking any question and without understand anything. If we let the our inner monster to take all of the control, Monster having really big troubles with “modern” social world. So because of that we need to give pet collar to our inner monster and we need to call it when we need is the best way to find balance.
First thing that I realized when I started to making personal analysis was when I started to questioning myself, life and other things its brings singularity and that is not healthy environment for my inner monster. Actually it’s not just brings singularity, it’s also brings loneliness. Of course we need to understand that our inner monster just a part of us. We can’t forget or destroy it.
Other part of this, after one point it’s so difficult to have communication with people who just living with their urges. Just because of that singularity bringing loneliness too. It’s not possible to have any healthy communication even. This is the most difficult part for our inner monsters.
The Things You Need to Remember
Of course that’s not just my inner monster’s fault. There were lots of mistakes that I made but I will keep them to myself.
Most important fact that destroying the balance is I was forget who am I and what I achieved in my life. It’s not about ego or proud of myself. Leaving the people and things that you know, you loved and trying to settle a new life in place you don’t know and trying to that alone is not a small thing. But depression can make you forget lots of things easily. The biggest mistake that I made was I chose wrong way for fight with the depression. It’s okay important thing is we need to able to learn our lesson and continue to our ways.
Everyone needs to be loved, feeling valuable for someone and this kind of feelings and sometimes those feelings getting much more importance in our lives. But if we are not showing these love or value to ourselves, who and why needs to that, right?
Finding The Balance
I’m still trying to accept the things and mistakes I had. For last 1 year I was act like a different person and it gave me little bit damage. But for now I’m much more strong and motivated to continue to my way.
I will be here with my new posts, photos and sets.